420snorlax:

i’m gonna start using this line

(via surprisebitch)



(via fake-mermaid)


metaknighty:

surprise your friends at rock paper scissors by throwing a punch instead

(via fake-mermaid)


me: do u wanna see a movie this weekend
nerd: yeah that sounds great!
me: ok have fun

meladoodle:

ohh nice drawing son… ill put it right here in the shredder where it’ll be nice and safe

(via fake-mermaid)


fukkkres:

mom: what did you get me for mother’s day

me:

image

(via fake-mermaid)


cakejam:

in exams like

image

(via stop)


sextingyourfather:

you laughing but yo laptop wet dumbass

sextingyourfather:

you laughing but yo laptop wet dumbass

(via surprisebitch)


wailordandsavior:

image

U DONT KNOW ME OR MY LIFE

image

(via fake-mermaid)


detainable:

if you don’t get my jokes then we can’t be friends

(via sloshes)


(via fake-mermaid)



jadehariey:

sukoshibot:

jadehariey:

jadehariey:

What’s the tallest buildings in your city?

THE LIBRARY BECAUSE IT HAS THE MOST STORIES 

image

I can’t believe I’m being punder arrest.

(via guy)


sorelatable:

Life is so hard when your best friend is a 9.5/10 and you’re a strong 4 with the right filter and lighting

(via guy)